A Moment of Doubt

10/15 What am I doing here? Seriously, what is it that I'm doing? Since May, I have painted the back wall of the Yap field office, helped at two sports camps (7 days total), inventoried the IRC in Yap, helped clean the Chuuk office, helped with the Chuuk PC yearly report, studied Chuukese, picked up supplies/resources, made initial intros in Houk, observed classes, assisted in a few classes and setup tutoring with a promising student. Five months of service, maybe one and a half or two months of work. Maybe not SO bad as I thought... but still, so much wasted time. 
If Woleai hadn't closed, I still would have spent two months in Yap, still would have spent three weeks in Ma'ap with Mom and Pops, and wouldn't likely have gotten much more done than I did- less boozing, though, I'd bet. It's July 22nd to today that would have been vastly improved. Three months sacrificed to switching sites. Three months of projects and greater competency in both the class and the community lost. It keeps going too. It'll be months yet before I get to where I was in Woleai. MST and travel after further compound the problem. I think I'm setting a better tone with my co-teachers though.